Relationships have
always been perceived in a certain way by humans. Since time in history, the
status quo is that men should be with women who are younger. In the
African setting, most of our parents have a three to five year age gap where in
this case our fathers are obviously the older ones.
Even in the creation
story, Adam was created before Eve. Thinking about it logically, it already
gives the impression that Adam was older and Eve was younger even though their
ages are not talked about in any Holy Scripture. They could have been the exact
same age, who knows? This younger woman-older man dynamic is one that has been debated
for some time now. With the growing number in divorce cases and broken
relationships all over the world, people have started to question if some of
the things they knew about love are wrong. More so when it comes to age. Is it just a number or
does it play a crucial role in the dynamics of a relationship? Let’s find out:-
1. Different preferences:
The assumption that
everybody must fit into this mold is absurd. All human beings have been
squashed into one category which is often not the case. Many successful couples
involve a younger man-older woman dynamic, same-age couples and others
involving people with bigger age gaps than society is used to. What is of
importance is that both parties are of legal age and are not being forced into
anything. Adults have the right to have personal preferences.
2. Age and maturity don’t always equate:
The traditional status
quo suggests that the man should be older because he’ll automatically be able
to be the solid figure of the relationship. In a utopia type of world, all men
would be solid and mature enough to hold their relationships together.
Girlfriends and wives would all be able to feel secure, loved and respected for
as long as they are with an older man. In reality, some men who are well into
their 30’s and 40’s still act childish. In such cases, their younger partners
end up holding the weight of the relationship so that it doesn’t fall apart.
Because of this, the myth that older men will always be mature is clearly
debunked.
3. True couples learn from each other:
Older women in
relationships with younger men and other unconventional relationships usually
have a lot to offer. Men who prefer older women are in agreement that they are
more focused in life, more mature and dedicated when it comes to long term
relationships. For the women, they end up learning that their partner is not as
immature as they thought they were. In short, other dynamics also have their
advantages that win many people over. Regardless of who’s older, there is a lot
you can learn from each other.
4.The world is changing:
The world is constantly
changing and becoming more open to new perspectives. With more examples of
successful men with their older wives, society is becoming less rigid on its
expectations. Famous couples such as Jason Momoa and Lisa Bonet or even Nick
Jonas and Priyanka Chopra, have paved the way for unconventional relationships.
The world is slowly accepting that the usual dynamics might not be the only way
to have a strong relationship.
5. Gender role bias:
Society has always had
it that the man should be dominant and in charge when it comes to
relationships. Based on this bias, the man is expected to be the older one
because it’s a symbol for dominance. In developing nations, women have been
seen as second-class citizens who should follow the commands of their husbands.
Unfortunately, many have used this as an excuse to manipulate and abuse their
girlfriends. With the onset of women empowerment, the gender roles have been
revised and women are not allowing themselves to be put down. They have
awakened and are now vocal about what they expect from their partners which in
all truth is only fair.