HOW DO I GET MY HUSBAND TO LISTEN TO ME?

In one of my Relationship Talks, I discussed on this topic

"EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION IN RELATIONSHIP AND MARRIAGE '', There was a question on `why do men find it difficult to listen and give due attention to their wives?` One of the guys in the discussion answered and said "Most of the time, some women just enjoy irrelevant conversations and the men are too busy to sit and listen to those unproductive words''

I pondered on his answer. You will agree with me that, of a truth, women are gifted in talking and can speak at length to the person they love so much, but there are tactics to speaking ,most especially to your husband, if you really desire his attention.

CHOOSE THE RIGHT TIME.

There is a time to talk and there is a time to be quiet. As a woman, you must study your husband's mood. It is not all the time that your husband want to converse with you or listen to you and that does not mean he hates you or fighting with you. When he just returns back from work is not the right time to begin to report the bad attitude the children displayed in School ,the NEPA and Water bills they brought or television subscription that is due.

Another thing is when you have hurts against him,before you express yourself study his mood. Ensure he is in a relaxed mood . When you take note that your husband is tired and he is dozing already during conversations then it is the right time to be quiet. Don't begin to nag him and force him to listen to what you have to say.

SPEAK EDUCATIVE AND INTELLIGENCE WORDS

Men are given to few words ,they don't have all the time to sit and listen to gists that are unproductive and irrelevant. If you desire to get your husbands attention avoid gossips, repetitive gists, emphasizing on one issue for long time; Nagging. Communicate with intelligence, give words of advice,speak words of wisdom, discus in the area of his interest. Discus issues that solves his problems and productive to him. Correct him too, but do it in love. Talk about your feelings, desire, emotions and needs too.

CHOOSE RIGHT WORDS

Season your words with the salt of grace .Ensure your speeches are graced always and encouraging. Deliberately choose words that are edifying. If your husband knows that your words are mind breaking, and he feels down casted any time you speak ,I assure you, he will always avoid talking to you. He will be scared and will not know the next bomb you are about to release on him. Avoid always blaming him,even when he is to be blamed. Don't talk to him like you are talking to your son or house maid. Talk with him don't talk at him. Correct him in love,do not sharply rebuke him.

USE EGO BOOSTERS

One key that will work for you is to always praise him,hail him,boost his ego ,any time you are having any conversation with him. Praise him when he says the right thing. Use appreciative words when in deep conversation with him.

BE A GOOD LISTENER TOO

Some women are given to too much talking. They can talk for Africa, When you want to say your own, they will tell you to wait ,that they are not through yet. Such women should learn to listen when their husbands are talking to them. Whenever you don't pay attention to what your husband is saying you send a message that you don't value him .When you listen to him you tell him that you respect and love him. When you listen you also increase in knowledge.

Don't just talk in your marriage, have meaningful communication.

Dont Forget To Read

YOU MUST HAVE YOUR OWN FENCE TOO

When I was in secondary school, my school did not have a fence round the school apart from the one built in front for the gateman, others areas like the backside and the rest were left open. At that time, it was difficult to restrain the students from going out of the school compound. After the morning assembly, many students would walk out of the school compound, some would go back home, some would go to their friends house, some would go to play, some would come into the school through bush track etc. Many crimes were recorded & reported in our school then. The situation really got out of hand. To curb all these situations, our principal then (Mr Ekefre) did something! We got to the school one day & found out that, they have used white canvas like paint to draw a line round the school compound. On getting to the assembly ground, the principal came to address us and said, ' We now have a fence in this school. That white line you see is the school fence for now! Once y...

I CAME WITH CONDOM. DON'T WORRY YOURSELF

You see that statement up there? Let me tell you about it. This Brother was one of the Coordinators in their fellowship. He was close to this sister and the sister too likes him just as brother in the fellowship, fervent and strong in the works of the Lord. One day, the brother visited the sister and at a time, the lady was serving the brother a soft drink when the brother grabbed her from the back and started hopping at her. The lady was taken aback as she never imagined such from the brother. The brother started forcing himself on the lady. She pleaded with him to stop the foolishness and reminded him of his position as a child of God and as a Coordinators in the fellowship. All her pleads fell on a deaf ears. She struggled to run out of the room, but the guy prevented her. At a point, she thought of a way out. She told the brother that, she will agree to have sex with him but he should go the nearby chemist shop and get a condom so she will not be at the risk of pregnancy. She said ...

WHY WOMEN CHEAT IN MARRIAGE

It is humane enough to give into temptations; emotions can be wild and desires like an untamed child. They can make you put all logic, rationale and ethics into the back burner. It takes a lot of effort and not to mention. one has to endure a different kind of pain altogether when one decides to side with morality. It is the pain of never knowing how the forbidden fruit would taste. Whatever it is, infidelity or loyalty is a personal choice. But to say married women cheat is a wrong and unethical statement. Well, not all married women but why some married women cheat is what we are getting at. Sometimes even women who have the picture perfect life find it difficult to resist the love seeks them out of the wedlock. knowing what makes women fall into extramarital relationships, sometimes despite living a perfectly happy married life. Here he cites few reasons:- 1. Sheer boredom: They say variety is the spice of life for a reason...

THE FAST CHRISTIANTY BROUHAHA

Fast Christianity like fast food has its advantages and disadvantages or pros and cons. Originally, the word “fast” is supposed to mean “speed” which is not a bad quality but in this context, it is bad because it is bogus. It is more or less a shortcut and of course short cut will cut you short. You cannot run faster than your legs nor can you put the cart before the horse. Slow and steady is helpful to cooking and Christianity. Usually, processes are vital to the outcome of production and processes take the time or rather processes are timed. For example, in cooking, timing is important. The difference between good and bad food is timing. If you don't time your cooking properly your food will get burnt or half-cooked. But fast food makes a mockery of all these. It is food at the speed of light. In cities and towns fast foods is becoming popular because most of its patrons have little time for homemade food. So, ""fast" is the way to go for the modern man. It saves h...

HOW TO KNOW YOUR SPOUSE IS REALLY SORRY

A repentant, regretful heart reflects a deep desire to change and accept 100-percent ownership. The occasional misstep means your spouse is moving toward genuine change — remember progress over perfection. Notice the moments you catch them “doing it right” and then, offer them encouragement. However, when blame shifts back toward you, it’s time to pray and consider if a “heart issue” is behind those actionsand words The following list are helpful tool for discerning a repentant heart:- #Repentant people are willing to confess all their sins, not just the sins that got them into trouble. A house isn’t clean until you open every closet and sweep every corner. People who desire to be clean are completely honest about their lives. No more secrets. #Repentant people face the pain their sin caused others. They invite the victims of their sin (anyone hurt by their actions) to express the intensity of emotions that they feel—anger, hurt, sorrow, and disappointment. #Repent...

Search This Blog